My Little Stutterer

I love Shell's Pour Your Heart Out Wednesdays, because I am one that REALLY loves to pour her heart out on her blog.  This week I'm dealing with something new and heartbreaking so here I go ~ 

A little over a week ago my little girl started to stutter. At first it would just be her repeating the first sound of the sentence over and over for a few times before she finally spit it out, but now it's worse. She actually will open her mouth and have such difficulty getting the word out that she just attempts trying.

This mama is HEARTBROKEN! I pray HARD that this is just some phase she's going through and she will outgrow it, and she won't stutter for the rest of her life.... because my heart can't handle her feelings getting hurt from the mean kids she'll encounter.

I made her a doctor's appointment, against everybody's advice. Even my son's speech therapist's advice. Luckily I saw him at the park and snagged him for a little insight into his brain on what we're going through.  His main advice was patience, don't put words in her mouth, basically just let her work on it on her own.  But she struggles and all I want to do is help her slow it down and give her the word she's trying to say.  

Now here's the downfall of parenting.  You hurt when they hurt and the more kids you have I think the more hurt you're going to have to feel!  With having an SPD child I've hurt a lot.  My heart has felt like it was literally stabbed when he comes home to tell me that some evil child has told him how weird he is.  My heart has been stabbed as I've watched him with his beautiful manner at the age of 5 walk up to a kid to play with him and introducing himself as Jayden, while putting his hand out to shake it ~ only for that evil child to turn around and walk away from him.

I don't want my kids to hurt more than general life already will make them hurt.  I don't want my daughter to come home crying because somebody made fun of her because no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get that word out.

I'm taking Ella to the doctors even if it's a waste of time and he tells me the exact same thing as the speech therapist told me, because I want to do everything I possibly can as early as I possibly can if this does indeed turn out to be a problem and not a phase.