30 Days of Truth ~ Day 4

Day 4 Something you have to forgive someone for

I don’t have a dad. I have a man that lives 7 miles away from me and doesn’t give a rat’s ass that I exist and is referred to as my sperm donor. This man is honestly a waste of space in my honest opinion and I know that I have hatred deep down inside for him not caring about me.

Probably the best thing he ever did was get fixed, because he has 4 daughters on this earth with 4 different women. The only daughter that really truly means anything to him is his youngest. The only one I don’t have a relationship with, because I don’t know her.

I need to forgive him in my heart for never being there for me in my life. I need to forgive him in my heart for not making me feel like I ever mattered…. I’ve always come last and now my kids do as well.

I do not want a relationship with this man. I don’t want my children to know him….. ever. I do need to forgive him and hold no more grudges. I need to do that, because that is right thing to do and if I want to ever be forgiven for the things I have done on this earth I need to forgive everybody ~ including my sperm donor.

Forgiveness does not mean that I am inviting him back into my life, because I have made the decision that I can’t have him as an alcoholic around my family. I cannot have him being so unstable around my family ~ my children deserve better than that and they should never feel like they are not important. And that’s what that man does.

I’ve got a lot of prayin’ to do about this, because forgiveness does not come easy.